The world is full of hurting Christians. Most were hurt by other Christians. We guard against the non-Christians but are commanded by God to be open within the walls o the Church. So we do. We allow fellow Christians to enter our hearts and share our lives with us. And we wiggle our way into their heart and share their lives.
We celebrate their victories and they cheer us on toward our goal. We encourage them as they endure challenges and they steady us as we race through life looking for the prize. We cry with them when they grieve and and they cry with us in the midst of our pain. Over time, our lives become intertwined. Our hearts beat as one. Blood is thicker than water and the bond created by Christ's blood grafts skin to skin and life to live. We become one with another.
Then we get sucker punched!
It hurts!
Can't breathe!
No where to run! No where to hide!
Maybe it was a mistake? I look for my friend. To receive an apology. She does not offer one.
Could this have been an accident because my "friend" would not intentionally do this to me. But, he did.
They provide an excuse in place of an apology. A reason is voiced in place of contrition. I contort my face into a for-public-use-only mask to hide my hurt. A fake smile is plastered to my face as I turn to slowly walk away. No direction, just away.
It hurts!
Can't breathe!
No where to run! No where to hide!
I stop, look around. Try to catch my breath. Try to sustain life. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. In. Out. In. Out.
Stunned!
In. Out.
Ashamed!
In. Out.
Questions. So many questions.
I thought... I thought... Then I felt!
I felt betrayed! I was!
I felt discarded! I Was!
I felt tossed away! I WAS!
Where was God when this happened?
He was there.
He was with me as my life crumbled.
He was there.
He was sharing my pain as my world turned upside-down.
He was there.
He tasted the saltiness of my tears as they coursed down my face.
He was there.
He was holding my heart as it shattered to pieces.
His grace was poured out all over me. Hi grace was covering me before. His grace covered me during. His grace covers me after. He was there then and He is here now. He loves me. He loves them. His love is special enough to be offered in pain. To all parties involved. To the one in pain and to the one causing the pain. His grace is sufficient for all situations.
He does not want His children to fight, but He knows they will.
His grace is sufficient.
He wants us to love each other, but He knows we sometimes don't.
His grace is sufficient.
He wants us to forgive the hurts others have visited upon us. Will you? Will I?
His grace is sufficient to allow us to forgive. Will you? Will I?
Let's trade prayers. Pray that I will have the courage to forgive those Christians who bully me and others. Also pray that I will allow God's grace and love to become incarnate in my life sufficiently to allow me to trust enough in Him to let my guard down around Christians again.
Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But sometime in the future. I trust God to lead me and to show me how to love again.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Sunday, July 10, 2011
The New Neighbor
Hi, my name is Rich and I'm your new neighbor. I've been here almost two years. Yes, it will be two years at the end of August. Yes , time sure does fly by. No, all our children are grown and gone. Three, two daughters and a son...
I have thought about printing something like the monologue above and shoving it in our neighbors mailboxes. Oh, we wave at each other as we pass each other at breakneck speed on to our destination de jour, but we never communicate. I don't know what is happening in their lives and I know they don't know what's up in ours.
I do know a few things, the neighbor across and to the right had a baby girl about 6 weeks ago. I know it was a girl by the pink bow on the mailbox. Hmmm, now would be a good time for me to bake some cookies (Nestle Tollhouse of course) and bring them a plate.
The neighbor in the next house has become a victim in this turbulent economy. He was the branch manager of a local bank when another local bank went under.. It did not really go under but the FDIC did take control of their assets and sold them to the parent company of my neighbors bank. There now existed two banks, by the same company, on the same block. The property belonging to the other bank was better looking and my neighbor ended up out on the street. Hmmm, I wonder if he would like some cookies too?
Maybe I've been going about this the wrong way. I'm the new neighbor but instead of me waiting for them to come welcome me to the neighborhood, maybe I need to go and tell them how honored I am to be able to live in theirs. I'll tell you later how it worked out.
Rich
I have thought about printing something like the monologue above and shoving it in our neighbors mailboxes. Oh, we wave at each other as we pass each other at breakneck speed on to our destination de jour, but we never communicate. I don't know what is happening in their lives and I know they don't know what's up in ours.
I do know a few things, the neighbor across and to the right had a baby girl about 6 weeks ago. I know it was a girl by the pink bow on the mailbox. Hmmm, now would be a good time for me to bake some cookies (Nestle Tollhouse of course) and bring them a plate.
The neighbor in the next house has become a victim in this turbulent economy. He was the branch manager of a local bank when another local bank went under.. It did not really go under but the FDIC did take control of their assets and sold them to the parent company of my neighbors bank. There now existed two banks, by the same company, on the same block. The property belonging to the other bank was better looking and my neighbor ended up out on the street. Hmmm, I wonder if he would like some cookies too?
Maybe I've been going about this the wrong way. I'm the new neighbor but instead of me waiting for them to come welcome me to the neighborhood, maybe I need to go and tell them how honored I am to be able to live in theirs. I'll tell you later how it worked out.
Rich
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